


Five times Josh talks about his boyfriend plus the one time Tyler meets him.

by noseandfeetarerunning



Series: Gin and Platonic [2]
Category: Twenty One Pilots
Genre: 5+1, Internalized Homophobia, M/M, bestfrens
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-02-04
Updated: 2017-03-15
Packaged: 2018-09-21 22:55:10
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 6
Words: 8,458
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9570434
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/noseandfeetarerunning/pseuds/noseandfeetarerunning
Summary: Tyler wants to be happy for his bestfriend, he really does. He's just forgotten, that's all.





	1. 一

**Author's Note:**

> I'm a pretty bad writer so kudos to you if you made it all the way to the end.

The first time Josh properly talks about Jamie is a whole month after their date in Manhattan. Tyler assumes the lag period to be for his mental wellbeing of suddenly acquiring a gay bestfriend, and is quite offended by Josh thinking he would be freaked out. Nevertheless, Tyler is not the one who starts the conversation.

"Wanna see this pic of Jay and me? It's pretty cute."

Tyler quirks an eyebrow before leaning over Josh's shoulder to take a glimpse at the phone. Why wouldn't he wanna see it?

What he thinks he'll see is two boys, at least a foot apart, smiling in front of some monument, like him and Josh always do. The only difference, he thinks, is the monument being a rainbow flag or something.

What he doesn't expect to see however, is a selfie of a fair haired boy pressing his face into the side of Josh's neck and Josh smiling that wide squinty eyed smile he always does after a great show. They were lying on a couch.

A selfie. On a couch. A selfie on a couch.

Tyler feels something. He doesn't know what it is.

A selfie. Was there no one else to take the photo? Of course there wasn't, they were on a couch, in a house. It wasn't Josh's couch, that's for sure. They were alone in Jamie's house. The only time Josh was alone with another guy was with him.

But past the weird feeling he gets, he can't deny that it was an incredibly cute picture. Josh looked happy. It was the first he'd seen of Jamie Harrison.

Josh was gauging his reaction. Tyler forces a tight lipped smile but was good enough for Josh as he releases the dam that once held back any homosexual content from his bestfriend. Tyler zones out a bit, unfocused eyes lying on Josh's excited face. He's aware of his emotionless face but can't stop thinking about how a boy is making Josh feel this way. Josh rattles on.

"-like what kind of tattoo artist doesn't have tattoos?" Josh exclaims, but he's smiling _so_  bright and his gaze is far off and he doesn't notice Tyler feeling the same feeling that leaves him so very confused.


	2. 二

The next time Jamie is brought up is while Josh is on call with him, that same night.

Tyler is casually eavesdropping from the bunk below. Although he can't hear more than muffled conversation, he can tell that Josh's tone is relaxed.

It's past midnight and the crew had knocked out within minutes of returning from their show. The low hum of the bus kept Josh's voice unheard, much to Tyler's disappointment.

The uneven roads almost rock him to sleep but his eyes fling open when he hears his name in passing conversation.

Sometimes Tyler misses Jenna so much he hears her voice, he assumes it to be another one of those times and tries to go back to sleep.

Ok. Its definitely not psyche Jenna. He can hear Josh saying his name multiple times and getting worked up above him, voice growing loud enough for Tyler to hear but not loud enough to wake anyone up.

Crap. What'd he do this time.

"No. Tyler's the only one that knows about us." He can't hear Jamie's voice but imagines it to be calm, steady, any two people as compatible as Josh claims they are should be able to counter-balance Josh's irratic behaviour.

"Yeah. He doesn't really talk about it, I showed him a picture of us today and he smiled a bit but that's it. I mean he used to always pester me about my love life and now it's just, quiet. I think he's having a hard time accepting me. But, I mean, I was raised Christian too y'know and _I'm_  the one with a boyfriend. Why can't he just be happy for me? It's hard enough as it is." Tyler really doesn't want to listen to this, but he does anyway. He closes his eyes, repeating the familiar ramble of an anxious Josh in his mind.

And he doesn't cry, he doesn't, because it's not correct and he loves his bestfriend enough to look past his sexuality and act normal and at least _pretend_ he doesn't mind.

And all of that is true, except the part it's not, and he just starts _bawling_ because he's been a bad friend and it _does_ bother him and he's been avoiding it and everything's just so _stupid_. The one thing that makes Josh the happiest he's ever been in his life and Tyler just had to ruin it by being selfish prick.

Even now, Tyler's crying because _he_ feels bad and not because he left Josh to fend those gay demons all on his own.

He sobs, choking back another wave of tears, usually when he gets like this, Josh stands outside his bunk and whisper-shouts through the curtain "Tyler can you keep quiet, some of us are trying to get some shut-eye here" and Tyler will feel better because who the fuck uses "shut-eye" and their inside jokes are so inside that he starts giggling. Josh will then crawl back into his bunk and dangle his hand out the side for Tyler to hold.

There it is again, Tyler realises he doesn't try to stay quiet so Josh doesn't hear. No. He's listening out for Josh's whisper-shout. Tyler, goddammit, you self-centered bastard.

But he just doesn't get it. How can a man love another man? It didn't bother him as much when it was someone he didn't know or care for, but this is Josh, _his_ Josh. He wants to understand, he swears he does. He gets that unexplainable feeling again. The one that just tears him into two halves.

Tyler thought back to the month following Josh's confession, how he avoided any aspect of Josh's love life. He definitely didn't _act_  like he wanted to understand. This brings on another wave of sobs. Tyler thinks it's a miracle Josh hasn't heard him, until realises how caught up in the telephone conversation he is.

"My name's on him too!" Tyler glances at Josh's name on his thigh. Well, this conversation has taken a drastic turn.

"What? No! If you ever get the chance to come, you're coming to see me, not interrogating my bestfriend." Jamie wanted to meet him? What?

"He's my friend. Nothing more, why are you doubting me. Trust works both ways, man! How do _I_  know you're not cheating on me." Tyler, once again, doesn't want to hear this so he forces himself to close his eyes and steady his breathing. A few sobs still make their way out but he's feeling less like a dick.

Josh's next sentence comes out a lot gentler,

"Hey, don't cry."

Tyler pretends those words were meant for him.

"Don't say that, you're the most selfless person I know. Its just this stupid bus and you're just stuck in that stupid job with that stupid boss and-I'm sorry. I really don't doubt you." his voice is quivering.

"And I know where your doubt is coming from, I do. But babe, you gotta trust me enough to know that I only love you, kay? I really didn't want to pull the L card but you're just too lovable."

Tyler smiles, hugging the pillow laying on his chest. He holds it tight, trying to fill the crater under his ribs left behind by that awful unnamed feeling. Josh is such a suck-up.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for the overuse of italics haha. More to come soon!


	3. 三

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Tyler and Josh make up.

The next time Jamie is brought up is a whole week after the previous incident.

They were atop the tour bus, having been impulsive from their post-show highs. Looking over the edge, Tyler mildly regrets climbing up there, just as he does climbing any structure during a show. He's been feeling nauseous the whole week and heights didn't make it any better.

The others were looking for them but they were quick to scale the vehicle as the crew packed up.

"Check the bus again!"

Being the narcissist he is, Tyler thinks of that line in March to the Sea. He almost lets out a giggle but stifles it as he hears footsteps approaching. Josh goes for it anyways. 

They lie flat on their backs, gazing at the stars, thankful for meeting the platonic love of their lives.

Tyler's just about to apologize for being a selfish prick when Josh breaks the silence with, "I heard you crying that night."

Tyler was surprised, to say the least. Nothing much had changed the past week. Other than the gut wrenching guilt he felt for being so absent, to which Josh seemed indifferent. They still joked around like bestfriends did, Tyler still talked about Jenna and Josh still talked about Jamie.

To anyone else, it probably sounded like a single sentence, but it was so much more to Tyler. The admission itself was a "I'm sorry I made you cry. I said those things in hopes of you hearing, but when I heard you cry, I felt really bad. I'm sorry." Josh didn't have to say those words for Tyler to know what he felt. That was part of the bestfriend deal; telepathy.

Josh did apologise anyway.

Tyler wasn't angry, pulling stupid shit like that was the reason they were such compatible friends. Forgiveness came easily enough for both of them, but only because the other overcompensated with regret.

"I'm sorry too man. First off for eavesdropping," Josh chuckles at this. "And for overall being a crappy friend this past month. I don't even know why it freaks me out so much. I think it's a 'fear the unknown' kinda thing. I don't want to be scared anymore though" Tyler looks over to Josh hopefully,  "So how 'bout you let me know all about him."

Josh turns to Tyler with a watery smile on his face. Tears had gathered at the corners of his squinty eyes. Tyler thought about all the times Josh sat through his overglorified accounts of Jenna Black, now Jenna Joseph, and how grateful he was for having such a beautiful bestfriend.

"Yeah? What you wanna know?" Josh let's out in a shaky voice.

"Well, is h-"

"Y'know something Ty?" Josh cuts him off mid-question. Tyler raises his eyebrows. "I'm so lucky to have you as my bestfriend. Why did you even accept my apology?" His voice breaks at the end. "Like I was such a dick, man but you still forgave me so quick and apologised for something you didn't do wrong and you're-. God I don't deserve someone like you." He whines out, completely breaking down.

Tyler cradles the back of Josh's neck and draws him in for a hug. He runs his fingers through sweaty yellow hair as he normally does whenever Josh gets worked up. It happens so often that one time, Tyler's hands turned blue from Josh's freshly dyed hair.

"Hey, don't cry. If anything Joshie, I don't deserve you. You're the kindest and nicest and sweetest person I know."

Josh struggles with a "Thanks" but doesn't stop crying.

"Tell me about Jamie. How tall is he?" Tyler asks hoping to take his mind off things. He continues stroking Josh's hair, the red paint around his eyes running down his cheeks. 

"He's about your height." Sniffle. "Maybe a little shorter, definitely taller than me though."

"Everyone's taller than you Josh." Josh playfully smacks Tyler's chest but laughs through his tears "Does he do cute things like Jenna does." Josh rubs at his eye, which Tyler finds pretty gross with all the paint that's there

"First off, Jenna's sneezes are scary." This time it was Tyler that did the smacking. "But yeah, he does do cute stuff. Like he always bites his lip whenever we facetime and ruffle his hair when I compliment him. And god, he blushes so much, it's the cutest thing ever. And he's so shy its just adorable."

"Oh oh he also has this dog named Curly that's so fricking huge and loves to attack him with cuddles. And he plays the uke, kinda like you." He says, lightly punching Tyler's arm. "He also keeps breaking up with me as a joke. But I keep track."

Tyler watches on with a fond smile, Josh was whipped.

"For real? How many times?"

Josh let's out a snort. "Probably the same number of times you've kicked me out of the band" The pair burst out laughing.

Tyler listens with a genuine smile on his face. The way Josh feels about this boy was how he feels about Jenna. That's one thing he understands, love. Tyler feels like he's falling in love with Jamie, which may seem weird, but Josh really does have a way with words.

"And he's so hardworking, he's got like 2 jobs even though he's still studying but he's too stubborn to accept any financial help from me which pisses me off so much but is still so damn admirable. I can't do what he does. It's amazing."

"Sometimes I send him gifts from the road and he'll shout at me over facetime, especially if they're expensive." Josh laughs, tears coming to a halt. "But then he'll cry and say thank you over and over and how it feels like I'm his sugar daddy and we'll both laugh." Josh buries his head into Tyler's chest, words muffled, "And I just love him so much Tyler, so, so much." he could tell, Josh spoke about Jamie the same way Tyler spoke of Jenna.

"Sugar daddy Dun. Nice ring to it. How old is he anyway?"

Josh mumbles something under his breath.

"What?"

"20"

"Woah. That's almost 10 years you cradle-robber." 

"But he's really mature for his age." He says, eyes going wide. "That sounded pedophilic. Swear I'm not." And at that exact moment, Tyler realises what the weird feeling was this whole time. He felt conflicted.

How can the Bible, a product of divine inspiration from his _saviour_ , say that whatever Josh was feeling was wrong? It was love and it's the purest kind there is because nobody wanted it in the first place. Not Josh, not Tyler, not even Jamie. Josh has a lot more too lose getting into this relationship than a straight one, and he knows that, but he went for it anyway. Because that's what true love is. And love, Tyler realises, is not something to fear.

"He still likes spongebob though."

…

When Mark finds them 4 hours later, they are _so_ due for a reprimand, but one look at their grinning tear streaked faces and they're let of with a stern warning from the crew.

After Josh leaves to wash up, Mark nudges Tyler in the shoulder and gently asks, "You ok now?" and Tyler didn't know he  _wasn't_ ok the past week till Mark said so, but the nausea was gone and he couldn't stop smiling.

"Perfect." And for once, he was telling the truth.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Not too fond of this chapter. Felt like I could have portrayed things better, but my abilities are limited haha. It was going so fast too. But whatever, I did my best. Thanks for reading and thanks to those who left such nice comments on the previous chapter.


	4. 四

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapters is... weird, not gonna lie.

"Oh _fuck._ "

Tyler whips his head up, jaw slacking, Tyler had honestly never heard Josh say the f word before.

 Josh had a hand over his mouth, a muffled "sorry" coming through. His wide eyes were locked on his mobile just as Tyler's had been. They were currently in Josh living room, tv on mute as they checked their social media accounts. They had a few days off before continuing the tour and as much as they'd like to go out, it was too hot and they were lazy.

"What's wrong?" Tyler gets up and stalks over to Josh's couch, but just as he's about to plomp onto the upholstery, Josh jumps up and rushes into his room shouting, "Nothing! I'm gonna take a shower, it's too hot."

Tyler sits there puzzled beyond belief. Once he hears the water running, he creeps over to the bathroom, inching his ear onto the door, Tyler smirks knowingly at the sound of Josh's faint panting.

It wasn't the first time Tyler noticed Josh doing stuff in the shower, or vice versa. Once he full on walked into the bathroom to take a leak while Josh was "showering".

He contemplates just leaving Josh alone but decides against it. That's what bestfriends are for. He grabs Josh's phone off the bedside table, punches in the passcode, and opens spotify.

It was still weird to him that Josh got off to the thoughts of men, but it didn't bother him as much. What if everyone was supposed to be attracted to the same gender? Would Tyler be in the wrong for loving Jenna just because it wasn't what the majority felt? Of course not. And he would be pissed if anyone stood in the way of him and his lady, he couldn't possible fathom how Josh must have felt.

He shakes his head to rid himself of those thoughts. No need to feel angry now when there's blackmail to be done.

As he's searching for Michael Jackson's 'beat it', the phone buzzes in his hand. Tyler has a moment of contemplation before deciding he has no morals and opens the message from Jamie.

Jay <3: where'd you go?

Jay <3: hellooooo????

He ignores the messages and scrolls up to find what caused Josh to be in the state that he is. He's slightly worried about finding more than he bargained for but decides that Jamie doesn't seem the kind to send nudes. Plus, they all know the Pete Wentz story.

The last sent picture was Jamie in pink swim trunks pulled low on his hips. Tyler snorts at Josh's low resolve but can't deny that Jamie looked pretty cute. The phone buzzes again with three more question marks and he has a mini freak out before typing.

Me: hey.

Me: it's tyler.

Tyler crosses his fingers hoping Jamie didn't still think Tyler was stealing his man.

Jay <3: hi!

Phew. They must have worked it out.

Jay <3: where's josh

Jay <3: did I scare him off with my beautiful ABDOMINAL MUSCLES.

Jay <3: jk

Jay <3: please don't think I'm weird.

Me: nahhh you did the opposite

Me: he's jacking off

Me: i mean like

Me: in the toilet

Me: not in my vicinity.

Jay <3: omgg

Jay <3: HAHAHAA

Jay <3: how'd you know

Me: he's loud

Jay <3: lol

Me: lol

Jay <3: play mj's beat it

Me: that's what I was thinking! Want a vid

Jay <3: yes please

Me: oh the shower stopped

Jay <3: that was fast ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

Jay <3: lol

Me: lol

Tyler adds Jamie's contact to his own phone before  connecting Josh's one to the speakers and starting to record.

"Guess what Josh just did." Tyler whispers into the mic. He barely holds back a giggle.

At the first creak of the opening bathroom door, Tyler presses play.

Josh lets out a loud yelp as the first notes play at full volume. His torso was bare and droplets of water were dripping down to the towel around his waist. 

"What are you doing!" he shouts over the music, confused but smiling, that's Josh, an eternal ray of sunshine. He stares at the camera from under his soaked fringe in amused confusion, but once the drumming kicks in, a sense of familiarity crosses his face. It takes a few seconds but his expression is quickly replaced with a mortified one.

"Oh my god. Tyler! Stop recording!" he reaches out to make a grab at his phone but Tyler swiftly dodges. Josh's constricting towel was no match for the years of basketball training under Tyler's belt.

Tyler jumps onto Josh's bed cackling as loud as the music and avoids every single one of Josh's attacks.

Once the chorus kicks in, Josh gives up as the voice of Michael Jackson surrounds the room, reminding him of his actions not too long ago. Josh is a blushing mess as he slides to the floor, both hands over his face. He let's out a loud groan and practically begs Tyler to stop.

Tyler's weak when it comes to his bestfriend so he turns the music off but he still has that shit-eating grin on his face. Josh glares so hard Tyler worries his face might melt.

"Please don't send that to Jenna." his voice is defeated because he knows Tyler shares everything with Jenna. Well, except the whole gay thing but that's only because he think Josh reserves the right to do it himself.

"You know I will man."

"Why? What have I done to wrong you!" Josh shouts overdramatically. Tyler chokes but continues recording.

"Nothing, a peasant should just be reminded of his place once in a while." he deadpans. Josh snorts but keeps up the act, crying exaggeratedly.

Tyler stops recording halfway through Josh's cry and sends the video to both Jamie and Jenna.

Josh is lying flat on his back, gaze far off as he whispers, "Jenna's gonna think I'm some obsessive jerker."

Tyler snorts and is tempted to say "so will Jamie" but doesn't want to ruin the surprise and instead says, "she already does man".

His phone buzzes multiple times and he opens the slew of messages from Jamie.

Jamie Harrison: omg

Jamie Harrison: HAHAAHHAAH

Jamie Harrison: you weren't kidding, he's blushing so much

Jamie Harrison: this is sooooo going into my blackmail folder

Jamie Harrison: but damn

Jamie Harrison: my boyfriends pretty hot

Jamie Harrison: and I thought MY abs were chiseled

Jamie Harrison: how can someone be hot and cute at the same time

Jamie Harrison: sorry I don't know why I'm telling you this

Me: It's cool. Josh says the same things. Nice to see that it's reciprocated.

Jamie Harrison: he does?

Me: all the timeeeeeeeee omg. No offence but sometimes he just goes on and on and I kinda tune out haha

Me: don't tell him I said that

Me: but I honestly dont mind, other than you he really doesn't have anyone to talk to about well,  _you._

Jamie Harrison: woah cool how'd you make it slanty.

Tyler smiles, this kid is cute.

Me: put * on both sides

Jamie Harrison:  _coooool_

Jamie Harrison: anyway..

Jamie Harrison: He talks loads about you too!

Tyler's just about to ask what exactly Josh says about him but said man was walking over to where Tyler sat.

"What did Jenna say?" he asks plopping next to Tyler now fully dressed. Tyler angles his phone away from Josh while replying with a "Nothing."

"Dude you've been texting someone for the past 15 minutes. If it's not Jenna who else could it be, I'm like, your only friend." True, but that doesn't mean he's not gonna defend himself. As Tyler opens his mouth to retort, Josh does a double-take before lowering his voice. "You're not having an affair right. Dude, you're my bestfriend and all but that's just-"

"I'm not having an affair! That's crazy, do you honestly think I'm capable of cheating on Jenna!" Tyler was ticked off and extremely glad he decided to send that video to Jamie. He stalks out the room with a huff and forgets all about texting Jamie.

That is, until 2 hours later when Josh storms into the living room after facetiming his boyfriend. Tyler is startled awake from his nap, heart beat rapid. 

"TYLER ROBERT JOSEPH I WILL ACTUALLY KILL YOU."

Tyler is afraid. He watches Josh stumble over his words. 

"Why-. How-. UGH" before faceplanting on the couch.

Tyler thinks Josh is shaking with anger until he hears muffled sobs and realises that he's trembling from crying. Oh crap.

"Josh I'm so sorry I sent that video. Please don't cry." he kneels beside the couch and puts a hand in Josh's hair, running his fingers through them till all the knots come loose. Josh's face is still pressed tight against the cushions and Tyler's worried he can't breathe.

Josh flips over, much to Tyler's relief, before stuttering out through his sobs. "I-its not the video. I'm just scared. Everything is going so fast. I don't know if I'm ready." a pout rested on his lips.

Tyler strokes his hair more, humming in agreement.

"We were facetiming and he told me that you sent the video to him and I was so embarrassed. But he told me not to be and next time when I visit he could maybe help me out."

Tyler was a little uncomfortable, to say the least, but a friend in need is a friend indeed right?

"And it made you uncomfortable?"

"No! God. I mean. I. I wanna do that kinda stuff with him. I really do. But I don't know how and sex- sex is a really improtant part of any relationship. And I really love him a lot. But he's a dude. And sex with a girl's fun. Cause I know where to put it and stuff but I've never done it with a dude. And what scares me is I _want_  to. I _want_ to do it with a dude you know what I mean? Feelings, feelings are directed towards personalities but sex is innate and I like dicks and flat chests and scruff and things that only guys have. And- do you know what I'm saying?"

Tyler is silent for awhile. That was a lot of rambling to process. But he gets what Josh is trying to say. You can get away with crushing on a guy because of the way he acts, and let's be honest, some women have behavioral traits that are usually synonymous with men, so it's easy to convince yourself you're not gay when loving a man because some girls have traits like his.

However, it's a bit more difficult to convince yourself you're not gay when you are sexually attracted to physical things only men have. Like dicks. Sexuality is something archaic and instictive. Being sexually attracted to a male means that Josh's fundamental human structure is gay. Yeah. At least that's what Tyler _thinks_ Josh means.

"Josh. Josh. Hey, listen to me." when Josh finally opens his tear glazed eyes, Tyler continues with, "I'm not gay Josh, so I'll never know how you feel but I do know that there is nothing wrong with liking guys. Peolle will say it's wrong. But love is love and you can't change the way you are, you didn't ask for this." Tyler wraps Josh in a warm hug. "I know for a fact Jamie will love you no matter what."

"Just know I'll love you no matter what too."  Josh gives a wide, grateful smile.

"Thanks Ty." he sighs

"No problem man." Tyler reponds, wide smile on his face. Josh however still seemed slightly troubled. "Anything else on your mind?"

Josh blushes deep, opening his mouth several times without anything coming out. Tyler gives him a reassuring shoulder rub before Josh blurts the next words out, "What if Jamie wants to top."

Tyler was so taken aback by the question he bursts out laughing. Of all things Josh could be worried about.

"Well, that's what the internet is for." Tyler said suggestively, wiggling his eyebrows. He takes Josh laptop from his room and opens an incognito browser as he walks back out to the living room.

He types in his most frequented pornsite which just so happens to have a gay category. His butthole kinda hurts looking at the thumbnail.

"TYLER. WHAT THE HECK." Josh says covering his eyes. 

"Dude. You gotta see it sooner or later." Josh was blushing so hard Tyler was worried his face would combust. He sneaks a photo and sends it to Jamie. 

"Ok this one looks cool. Plain ole vanilla. Go in your room and watch it, tell me what you think once you're done." Josh obediently follows Tyler's instructions, locking his door behind him.

Tyler returns to his phone noticing a reply from Jamie.

Jamie Harrison: awwww what's he watching that's got him blushing so hard.

Me: porn lol

Jamie Harrison: lol

Josh appears 20 minutes later, hair disheveled, t-shirt askew.

"Yup. Pretty sure I'm gay."

Tyler takes the laptop from him and goes back to google.

_how to have gay sex_

They read the well organised list, nodding and taking notes. Tyler honestly doesn't want to be there but decides to just entertain Josh.

"I'm gonna buy some lube now." Josh says in resolution standing up from the couch and heading to get his keys.

"Ok." Tyler says, still confused as to why it would hurt to put 2 fingers up your butt when poop is about the same size.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I feel like my chapters get worse as I go on. That part about the butthole was so weird I'm sorry.


	5. 五

"Hey Mark?"

"'Sup man?"

"I'm gay." Tyler spits out the milk he's drinking, failing to choke back his laughs. He could feel some clogging his nostrils. The rest of the crew barely take their eyes off the television screen, laughing lightly at the supposed joke.

Mark has his wtf face on before guffawing with Tyler at Josh's spontaneity. He'd been debating with Tyler on how to come out. Guess he decided to just go for it.

"Why you directing that to me man. There's like, 7 other people here too. I mean… unless, you wanna get some of this?" He says sensually rubbing his hands over the length of his body, wiggling his thin eyebrows.

"God no. Ew. What the heck." Josh looked genuinely disgusted at the thought. "If anything, I'd go for Tyler." Tyler smiled brightly at Josh. Tyler hears a muffled, "been reading too much fanfiction." from under Mark's breath but assumes Josh hasn't heard as he turns back to the others.

"Are you guys listening to me." multiple grunts echo around the room. Tyler's eyes follow as Josh huffs and stalks over to the tv before unplugging it.

A chorus of protests erupted, one yell, before they pattered off at the sight of Josh with the most serious expression he could muster.

"You're serious?" someone quipped. Josh nodded slow and firmly, leaving a silence for the information to settle in. It was pregnant, palpable, it was the encapsulation of that one month Tyler spent ignoring Josh's sexuality. The whole month in that four seconds. The 'oh god's to the 'he's seen me pee' and even 'am I…his type?'. Tyler could see those questions through their eyes and realised how trivial his conservative thoughts had been, how menial they were compared to the love for his bestfriend

"Called it." Mark hollered from his corner, four seconds later, breaking the silence. He sighs, "Can't ever keep his eyes off me."

Mark winks to Josh, not suggestively as his sentence would imply, but the equivalent of a nudge and a "don't worry, I got your back bro." 

And he did, breaking the silence had tipped the others the same way Tyler had when Josh showed him that first photo of Jamie. 

The others laughed, and were seemingly less spooked. They realised that Josh was the same guy that could take a joke, and give one just as easily. It was the same guy they befriended the first day they the met, nothing had changed.

It took them a whopping four seconds to get over Tyler's one month dilemma.

"Come on, group hug." Tyler initiated, and they all piled in because Josh was the platonic love of everyone's lives.

As they remained squished together, the questions started pouring in.

"Is he hot."

"Super."

"What's his name."

"Jamie."

"How far have you two gone."

"Second ba- that's a little inappropriate don't ya think."

"Can we meet him."

"About that… I may have invited him on tour for, like, a week."

Tyler perks up at that, he's been texting Jamie for a while, gauging the boy's intentions with Josh. So far, he seemed like a pure, genuine kid, but a face to face inspection would really be helpful.

The group hug dissolves and a smatter of 7 fully grown men stare at Josh with evil grins.

"Please don't fuck this up for me." Josh blurts out. "I really like him."

The fully grown men coo before going in for another group hug.

The bus door opens, Brad stepping in with an inquisitive look. 

"Jamie's coming on tour with us." Michael states from the middle of the group hug, no context whatsoever.

"Nice." Brad replies, he's starting to get used to all the surprises. He's learnt to just go with it and not question anything.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Next update may take a while, it's still in the works but I think I like this chapter. If you spot any mistakes please feel free to leave criticism :)


	6. +1

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm soooooosososos sorry this took so long. I just wasn't satisfied with anything I wrote. I'm still not happy with the way it turned out but itll have to do I guess. thanks for sticking around and waiting, and all the brilliant comments and encouragements throughout this entire mess of a story :) welp this is the last chapter so... see you on the other side!

Josh was excited. More excited than he had been when Tyler first gave him the call to fill in for Twenty One Pilots, and even more excited than the time he met the original Spooky, David Duchovny. 

But excitement wasn't the only thing swirling around in the depths of his stomach, other than the taco bell he had earlier, Josh was almost shaking with anxiety.

He sat cross legged on the covered toilet seat, staring emptily at the two packages of hair dye in each hand. So many things could go wrong tonight; at this rate, he could shit his pants, no joke, he's come  _real_ close.  

And although that possibility portrays itself, Josh worried excessively about  _losing_ the kid. Jamie may hate him all of a sudden and never tell Josh why, and that scares him. He could live with the embarrassment of shitting his pants in public, but Josh didn't think he could live without Jamie Harrison.

For once in his life, Josh Dun was being selfish. He was keeping the bestest human with him for  _at_   _least_ eight thousand years. It was already decided. Even if Josh didn't deserve him.

"Tyler?" he shouts from his throne. "Can you help me with something." 

Josh was aware of how similar it sounded to the start of a B grade porno.

He hears the halt of packing and a bit of shuffling before Tyler's head pops into view. He quirks his eyebrows in question.

"Do you remember my natural hair colour?". He hands the two boxes of various nut coloured dye to his bestfriend. 

After close inspection Tyler states, "I think it's in between man."

"Can we mix dye? Does that work?" Josh asks still inspecting the packages. Tyler shrugs, "No harm trying." and rips open the packaging.

"What if he hates me all of a sudden."

Tyler smacks his head with the box, "don't be stupid." he says. And somehow that makes Josh feel better.

It is only when Josh's head is half dyed that Tyler realises the anomaly in colour. "Wait a sec. Why're you dyeing it back. You love bright colours." he halts running the hotel toothbrush through Josh's hair and uses the end to scratch his nose. "Did momma dun scold you."

"Nah, my mum's used to it by now." He said picking at his nails. "Just wanted to surprise Jamie, he saw some pictures of me with my natural hair and he really loved it." Josh sighed. "I'd do anything to make him happy."

Tyler frowned. "Are you keeping this colour for long?"

"Probably, I don't know, see if Jamie likes it first, I guess." Josh said resignatedly. "My mum too."

Disappointment flashes across Tyler's face. "You know you don't have to do it if you don't want to right?"

Josh gave a half-hearted shrug. "Yeah I know. But I dont mind. Whatever makes him happy." Tyler didn't understand how sacrifices had to be made when keeping the love of his life, Tyler was actually  _good_ enough.

"Ok… as long as you know what you're doing." He says accusingly. Josh grins at him as he continues brushing dye into his hair. Tyler's a pretty supportive bestfriend.

[][][][][][]

The collective few hours Tyler had spent texting Jamie felt a lot more significant when the doorbell rang. He felt time slow against his will, just when his curiosity peaked. His thoughts travelled to the extensiveness of the internet and phones, were they making relationships more superficial?

Josh runs to get the door and lunges at the figure obstructed by the doorframe. Tyler is almost disappointed, but it seems that the unidentified figure had a lot more pent-up energy as Josh comes staggering backwards through the entryway, both hands heaving the human-sized koala bear attached to his front. Tyler decided that no, telecommunications brought about beautiful things.

Jamie has a smile as bright as Josh's, no doubt enhanced by the fact Josh invited him on tour. The two stumble around before Josh gently sets him down.

Jamie Harrison was somehow fairer than his photos, softer features, fluffier hair. The boy carried himself in a way that made him seem small and reserved even when he was smiling as wide as he was.

Tyler stands from the sofa bed and dusts off his jeans before sticking a hand out to Jamie. The fair haired boy only then takes his eyes off Josh, turning to stare at Tyler's outstretched hand. His mind was still in that state of euphoria where it took a few moments to process his surroundings.

Jamie has his bloated haversack on his back, both fist clenched tightly around the straps, before he kicks into motion and fumbles to grasp Tyler's hand. 

"Nice to meet you." he says, laughing nervously the same way fans do, but not really.

Tyler smiles a reassuring smile, no teeth, "nice to meet you too." their hands are still grasped and shaking awkwardly. The two most important people in Josh's life. It's quite the pathetic sight. Tyler quickly drops his hand once he realizes.

Jamie turns back to Josh, who has both eyebrows raised, and somehow smiles even more. He giggles without reason and runs his hands through Josh's hair so intimately that Tyler feels like he's intruding.

"It looks really good." he whispers, both hands still in the damp mess on Josh's head. Josh smiles as big as he can without revealing the fact that he loves blinding colours.

"He dyed it for you, man." Tyler interjects, extra brownie points for his main man. Jamie giggles sweetly.

They kiss. And. Ew. Is that what Josh feels like when he kisses Jenna. Tyler hopes they're not holding back for his sake,  he can't possibly fathom the thought of anymore affection in his absence.

Tyler tries to peel his eyes away but remains gawking at the two, or more specifically, Josh. Josh pushes himself closer to the boy, not anywhere close enough, and Tyler smiles because his bestfriend was in love. He giggles out of excitement. 

There was a pre-tour party at night as a celebration for all the hard work in preparing the tour. Done was the strenuous part, now came the fun, the performances, the _music_.

It was also a good time to meet and interact with the people they were touring with. Most were carried over from the previous tours but there were necessary additions as the shows grew larger. Jamie being one of them.

Tyler settled back on the couch, they still had a good few hours before the party and the three were waiting for Jenna to arrive before commencing the double date that Jamie insisted on.

When Tyler first mentioned the idea of a double date to Jenna, he completely forgot that she didn't know Josh was dating someone. He immediately clams up once she starts pestering him with questions, there aren't many things they keep from each other and Tyler could hear the hurt slowly creep into her voice. Nonetheless, he respected Josh's decision to tell her himself. Sometimes Tyler forgets Josh is her friend, not just her husband's bestfriend.

"Did you.." Jamie starts, turning his head to Tyler while snuggling deeper into Josh's side, he seemed genuinely curious. Tyler raises both eyebrows in questioning, he was happy to know Jamie took some interest in him. 

"Marry a snail." he finishes, bursting out into laughter. Tyler's face instantly snaps into a frown, scaring Jamie for just a sec, before he bursts out laughing as well.

Josh sits there confused beyond belief.

"Did I... miss something? Why's that so funny." he furrows his eyebrows.

"Be-because, Jenna's so slowwww." Tyler gasps out between his giggles. The two launch into another round of laughter.

Josh rolls his eyes as a knock comes from the door. There is sudden silence, an air of solemnity settling, they glance at each other. Josh looks anxious.

"Well, moment of truth." he chuckles out nervously, knuckles white in Jamie's hand.

Tyler stalks over to the door, prepared to give Jenna a welcome kiss. He unlocks the door and swings it open, lips puckered expectantly only to be disappointed by Jenna rushing pass him into the room yelling , "I want to meet her!".

Josh positively pales at that.

Tyler sighs and slams the door shut turning to see Jenna hastily putting her bag down before glancing at the two boys on the couch. She does a double take. 

"Who's that." The two stare at each other 

"This's Jamie. My uh date." There's a bit of awkward staring before Jenna climbs beside them on the couch and introduces herself to Jamie, rattling off a series of questions like it didn't matter that he was a boy. The tension leaves Josh's shoulders and a smile overtakes his face.

She always was more open than Tyler, maybe that's what attracted him. 

They keep up the conversation animatedly and Jenna seems unperturbed by the situation, even the significant age gap. She just gently slaps Josh's thigh while wiggling her eyebrows. Josh laughs and says, "What a catch, amirite?"

Josh wraps an arm around Jamie and kisses his blushing cheek when Jenna states how cute he is. Jenna is so intrigued by him, Tyler realises, she completely misses Josh's hair. 

"I bet he dyed his hair just for you." Spoke too soon.

Jamie groans and Josh decides that's enough teasing, cutting Jenna off with a "So. What movie are we watching?" Jamie sends an appreciative smile his way.

"Whiplash!" Tyler says for, possibly, the 100th time. But for the first time, someone else was saying it with him.

Jamie looks over with widened eyes, "I love Whiplash!"

Josh let's out a groan, "Not you too!"

"Fuck off Johnny Utah, turn my pages, _bitch_!" Jamie shouts with such conviction Tyler starts cackling because he's never had the guts to quote the movie, and it somehow feels like he's living precariously through the younger boy.

Jenna and Josh are gobsmacked that someone as innocent looking as Jamie is capable of such foul language.

Jamie is subtle and unassuming and he curses and swears like it isn't a sin. Tyler loves it.

Tyler leans over to Jamie for a high five, but Jenna smacks his arm away from the boy, "Tyler! Are you really high fiving the boy!". Tyler mouths an "ow" while cradling his arm but responds with a sarcastic "Yup!" emphasis on the popped p. He thinks he's gonna start cursing more.

Josh starts laughing at the irony of the situation, and it's only a matter of time before Jenna joins in as well. Seems like they were all living precariously. Tyler is Jamie's number one fan, he's decided, anyone who can make his two favourite people laugh that hard deserves the title.

Josh grins at his boyfriend, "You kiss your momma with that mouth?" he teases.

Jamie is bashful, "I kiss  _you_ with this mouth" before planting one right on him. They smile like they were in love. Which they were.

Josh let's out a content sigh. "You'd think the drummer would like this show the most. I don't. I hate it. Tyler has ruined it for me. But I like Jamie more than I hate Tyler, so let's watch this crap and get it over with." Jamie doesn't stop smiling throughout the movie, not once.

The movie consists greatly of Josh making out with Jamie, Tyler  _trying_ to make out with Jenna, and Jamie quoting everything, word for word.

As the credits roll Josh let's out a "Finally! That movie makes me feel bad about how little I practice."

Tyler chuckles as Jamie states, "You don't really need practice though. I've heard you drum."

"Internet stalking your boyfriend I see." Josh wiggles his eyebrows causing Jamie to blush.

"You're really good though." says the little suck up, how is Tyler supposed to compete with this?

Josh waves him off, not accepting compliments as usual. "We should get ready."

Jamie nods, stretching his lanky self. "Gotta make myself look pretty for your friends."

Jenna watches in awe and Tyler nudges her in questioning. She whispers to Tyler, "He's like a mini you." Tyler watched Jamie scratch his belly lazily, and yeah, Tyler could see the resemblance.

"You gonna leave me for him?" he teases, hooking his arm around her waist. She lays her hands on his chest rolling her eyes, but leans in for a kiss nonetheless.

"I'll never leave you."

Tyler wonders how he got so lucky.

"Cause you make dem big bucks. Ayeee."

[][][][][][]

Tyler observed the two, lost in their own personal bubble of innocent giggles and sweet nothings. He wondered when he'd missed that window. He was not oblivious, it was quite evident the similarities he shared with Jamie, Jenna may have been joking, but there was some truth behind it. Maybe not in appearance, Tyler was all dark, sharp angles, while Jamie was fair and soft, but in the way they acted, and the way they spoke, and their thoughts seemed quite linear, Tyler wondered when he missed the opportunity to belong to Josh Dun. It was beyond the author's word now, the book was over, but Tyler still reminisced in the 'what if'. He never would have and never will have acted upon the option of dating his bestfriend, but it was an option nonetheless.

The thought had inched it's way into Tyler's brain, feasting on whatever blessings the past years have brought upon him. He looks on at the two with a longing gaze. Perhaps, if he had put his dignity, his reputation, his belief behind him, he would be happier than he was now. He let the thought fester.

But 20 degrees to the left, someone was squeezing their way through the crowd, hoping to, and successfully grabbing his attention.

She stood tall in her yellow dress, eyes somehow brighter than all the stars combined. And whatever false hopes he had held, whatever doubts about his current life, were washed away in that single smile. 

"Hey babe." she kisses him sweetly, too feminine for anything that Josh could have conjured up. He wraps an arm around her slim hips and grins lovingly at her.

"Why are you looking at me like that."

"You're just so beautiful."

"Tyler." she sighs, "you're not getting laid tonight. Stop trying. I'm on my period."

"I know that and. Ew. Can't I tell my wife how beautiful she is?" she rolls her eyes before something catches her gaze.

"Why don't you go talk to Jamie? He's, amazingly, alone now. Didn't know those two could be separated without some sort of surgery." She snorts, but there's fondness and nostalgia in her eyes, reminding her of the times when they were so similar.

Tyler chuckles, squeezes her hand and stalks over to Jamie, who looks out of place without Josh by his side.

"Hey." Jamie looks up from his twiddling fingers and grins. He gives the room a once over before turning his full attention to Tyler. He seemed distressed. Tyler quirks an eyebrow.

"Nobody's talking to me. Other than you, I mean, and thanks for that." he flusters out, Tyler nods in acknowledgement, "is it cause I'm gay?" Tyler almost chokes on his spit but manages to splutter out.

"What- no, no no no no no. No. They just, uh, Josh kinda, uh, said something." Tyler somehow made it even worse, Jamie's eyes were wide with hurt.

"No. Wait. What I mean is, ugh, words are hard, he kinda threatened everyone? Not to fuck it up for him? Yea. That's it. Plus the two of you looked so caught up in your own little bubble. Nobody really wanted to mess with that." Jamie blushes at that, he was so smitten.

"Oh."

"Yea."

"Does Josh… not like his hair?" Tyler stares blankly for a fraction of a second. What? "I just noticed, he seemed kinda sad whenever I talked about it."

"Oh you mean like the colour! Umm. I don't know, but I do** know he likes bright colours. And I mean there's got to be a reason he dyed it so many times." He let's out a nervous laugh.

"Oh."

"Yea." They repeat. "He dyed it for you." Tyler adds.

"Well, now I feel bad."

"Don't be, Josh is like that, he'll make you happy at the expense of himself sometimes."

"And… you just accept that?"

Tyler flusters a bit before telling the truth, "Well... I guess I do. Sorry."

Jamie shakes his head a bit, "No. I'm sorry for putting you in a tight spot."

Tyler shrugs his shoulders, "It's not good for him. I just.. Always thought he was an adult that knew what was best for himself. But subconsciously, I knew better, I just hated confrontation." he never saw how big a deal it was before now. He felt like a shitty bestfriend.

Jamie lays a hand on his shoulder and smiles a reassuring smile. "Hey, it's not your fault ok? Besides, it hasn't gotten too bad yet, I'll talk some sense into him."

"Yeah, he'll listen to you." Jamie blushes but gives out a toothy grin nonetheless.

And when Josh goes on stage the next day looking a lot less miserable in highlighter yellow, Tyler is so incredibly grateful for Jamie Harrison.

The feeling is intensified 6 months down the line, on Josh's 30th birthday. Rocking his chestnut brown hair, his natural hair colour may have been mistaken for a relapse. Tyler demands an explanation but his "reaching the big three zero" had really put things into perspective, apparently.

"I just feel like coloured hair was a phase of my life that I needed, it was a way to express myself, very much like my tattoos, it was important, but it's over, I'm grown ass man now." Josh states, smiling. Tyler's was so proud of his bestfriend. "Besides, I've got other more important things to attend to." he grins as he squeezes Jamie's shoulder.

Tyler's moment of realisation occurs then. A few months before Josh was three decades old, Tyler had approached him on his and Jamie's similarities. Josh didn't deny it and instead stated that the fair haired boy had  _something_ Tyler just didn't have. It stung, but now he understood what that _something_ was. Tyler wouldn't have been able to solve Josh's insecurities, the best he could do was comfort. But Jamie could, and Tyler was wrong for ever doubting him.

Besides, they were better off bestfriends.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> that was a shitty ending wasn't it. definitely not worth the wait. I'm sorry, everything just comes back to joshler doesn't it aha. ive got some ideas for new ones, ill probably post them regardless of whether theyre good or not, I'm shameless haha. thank you guys once again for reading my dumbass stories and all the encouraging comments :)

**Author's Note:**

> Thanks for reading!


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